How to Have a Relationship With Someone With Borderline Personality Disorder
Does your guy have borderline personality disorder? The men borderline
personality disorder are unable to maintain a relationship
stable and this is the major hallmark. If your
partner is suffering from BPD, here are some tips
to keep your relationship with him stable. Get
ready to do anything you have the potential to
do and save your relationship.
Tips for a Stable Relationship
1. Manage Your Behaviors
The first tip is to manage the behavior of your partner. For this, the
requirement is to maintain your own behaviors first
of all. Have a good control over you when your
partner shows his extreme behaviors. Also, figure
out the strategies and stick to it to deal with
his extreme behaviors.
2. Four D’s Tip
If situations are getting worse and out of your control, practicing four
D’s can help you.
l Delay: Give me some time to think about it.
l Distract: Let’s go to a dinner.
l Depersonalize and Detach: Do not consider BPD attacks personal. Also,
try to stay relaxed and cool.
3. Set Limits in Your Relationship
People suffering from BPD show extreme behaviors like yelling, threatening
suicide or blaming etc. Suicidal attempts are the
most common as a result of this personality disorder.
You can handle such a situation by emotional response.
For controlling his behavior, learn your boundaries
and then set limits. When you see he tries to push
your limits like by suicide threatening, be emotionally
responsive to control him or seek for help.
4. Diagnosis Is Important
If you and your partner do not know about the disorder, you would be unable
to understand the behavior of your partner with
BPD. The BPD disorder is a misunderstood disorder
indeed. If your partner is suffering from any other
disorder like depression and reacts differently
than the patients of depression disorder and you
note extreme behaviors, have a diagnosis of BPD
5. Learn What is BPD
If your partner is suffering from BPD, you need to learn about BPD at first
to understand your partner for maintaining your
relationship. Learn about the disorders and extreme
reactions in BPD in detail. This will help you
in healing your partner and protecting you as well.
6. Protect Yourself
People with BPD do not have empathy for others. They only want their needs
and wants and want to get a control over other.
For example, he threatens you to give him all of
your money. In such a situation, do not sacrifice
yourself instead make strategies to protect yourself.
7. Love Your Partner
Often people neglected or abused in childhood suffer from BPD. Do not blame
your partner for his outrageous behaviors. Love
with him and if he abuses or yells at you, avoid
taking it personally. Treat him with love in a
8. Be Realistic
A person with BPD does not understand emotions and coping mechanisms like
normal people. Therefore; be realistic and be a
good caretaker of him. Understand that your partner
is unable to meet your emotional needs. Therefore;
heal yourself and your partner too emotionally.
Give your partner space to develop an emotionally
9. Make Use of Compliments
Another tip is to use compliments for building trust and influence in the
life of your partner with BPD. Compliment him for
his every little act and the results would go a
long way. Reward him for his every good behavior
like I like you because yesterday, you stopped
yelling at me. Look at the right time and mood
of your partner to use compliments; else he may
come up with an unexpected extreme behavior
10. Try Therapy
Convince your partner for a therapy. Try to be strong in yourself. Develop
trust in your partner with BPD. Make efforts to
heal your partner being a good caretaker of him
and take care of yourself too. Do not be disappointed
and have a hopeful hope.